It’s been just over six weeks since we reported on news that reality star Savannah Chrisley and Luke Kennard of the NBA’s Detroit Pistons were dating.
Yes, we said “were” dating, because even though the young couple began gushing about one another on social media less than two months ago, their relationship can now only be discussed in the past tense.
Or at least that’s what several media outlets reported yesterday.
Bizarrely, Savannah’s dad, Todd Chrisley, is now denying the breakup rumors, and insisting that yesterday’s reports were nothing but “noise” and #FakeNews from the tabloid media.
We’d probably be a lot more likely to believe the denials if they came from Savannah or Luke, and not from Savannah’s famously image-conscious father.
But we’re getting ahead of ourselves.
First, the story, as it was reported last night:
It all started while Savannah and Luke are on vacation with her family in the Cayman Islands.
They were posing for lots of pics, and then suddenly they stopped.
Interestingly, Savannah then went through her Instagram page and deleted every photo of Luke.
Now, we probably don’t need to explain to you that if a teenage girl deletes you from her Instagram page, she is fully done with your ass.
Even more tellingly, today is Savannah’s birthday, and she and Luke are spending it apart.
Throughout all this, however, Todd has steadfastly maintained that everything is just fine.
“So proud of these two and how they NEVER listen to the noise,” Todd wrote alongside the above IG photo of Savannah and Luke.
“I hope you guys are having an amazing time.”
And why would Todd lie about such a thing?
Because he’s a reality star, you see, and that’s the most ironic job title a person can have in 2017.
As far as we can tell, it consists of 90% lying about the details of your life and 10% lying about the quality of your show, so as to better promote it on Twitter.
Sean Spicer is unemployed now, so it’s a safe bet that he’ll be popping up on some TLC abomination entitled Some Like It Spicy any day now.
Anyway, the point here is that there’s still a very good chance that Savannah and Luke are broken up.
And even if they’re not, we have a hard time believing this was just all a big misunderstanding.
If they are still a couple, it probably means that they broke up and then quickly got back together.
And if that’s the case, there’s a very good chance they’ll break up and get back together many more times, because they’re 19 and 21, and everyone who’s even slightly younger than us is seconds away from a dumb decision at all times.
Now if you’ll excuse us, we have some kids to chase off our lawn.